Morning finally dawned. I sat up in my sleeping bag, leaning back on my hands. Golden sunlight spilt through the front window and splayed across the floor, its beams catching the dust particles as they reached downwards. Max stirred in his spot on the opposite side of Amy. Propping up on one elbow, he looked over to where I sat.
“Did you sleep?” He whispered.
I gave him a slow, small smile, replying in a low tone, “Not well. Did you?”
Max opened his mouth to answer, but just at that moment, Amy stirred slightly. Seeming to want to avoid waking her, Max got up and moved to sit beside me.
“I slept some.” He replied.
Something about the coziness of the sun warming the room, and Max’s closeness had my focus on anything but our conversation. Despite my lack of concentration, we were able to discuss our plans for the day. There was little talk of finding a more permanent home farther from the city. Arguably, it was more of an emotional decision, but we could not bring ourselves to find another home knowing that Amy liked it here so much. We let her sleep as we prepared breakfast, letting her eat it in her sleeping bag when it was ready.
An hour later, we were making our way northward into the denser area of the city, hoping to accomplish our plans of replenishing our supplies. Soon we were in a proper neighbourhood, passing house after house, quiet and abandoned. Doors hung open and windows were broken. The city felt neglected. The little patches of green were left as overgrown and un-manicured partitions of grass. Decorative trees, which had been planted along the sides of the street, now grew far too big. Their roots reached and heaved out of the cracks in the sidewalk, as though breaking out of a tomb.
In only a little time, we were beginning to near what seemed to have once been city central. The transition from neighbourhood to proper city had been obvious – buildings grew in size, coffee shops became frequent, and little areas to sit and appreciate public art were carved out of the brick and concrete of the surrounding buildings and walkways.
Max lead the way towards a pharmacy which lay on the left side of the corridor of skyscrapers that we had found ourselves walking between. A shiver crawled up my back. It was so deadly quiet. Where were all the people? I did not expect there to be a bustling city as there once would have been; yet, I had imagined we would see at least a few people. The longer we walked in the eery silence, the more urgently my gut told me we were being watched.
As we approached the pharmacy, my vision suddenly blurred. Not much, and only for a moment, but it was disorienting. I squeezed my eyes shut and blinked them open again. Strange. I thought, this is just like the countless other times I have gotten supplies from stores. Lights were off, shelves were in disarray, and an eery quietness hung over everything. I still remember the first time I had ever “stolen” anything from a store. It was during the first month after everything had begun. I had run out of food from my family’s house. The few remaining neighbours who would talk to me – some people were so afraid they stayed hidden away in their houses, barricaded from the world – were just as low on supplies as I was. Some people had moral quandaries about taking things from stores, but I did not. From my perspective, it was not stealing. The stores were abandoned and people needed food and supplies. It seemed like an acceptable solution. Not to mention that it was really the only feasible option. It is not like I was not afraid to do it, though. There is just something truly unsettling about doing the very thing you were always told not to do as a child. Besides, it was frightening to walk on the abandoned streets alone, constantly fearing every noise as though it were a landslide or person wishing to do me harm.
Now it felt as if I were walking the same path, this time in an entirely new city and more importantly, with people. So why was my heart racing? We exited the store after grabbing first aid supplies, vitamins, and medicine, then walked along the sidewalk, continuing our trek further into the heart of the city.
We were relieved to find a grocery store not too far up ahead. My chest now ached from its ceaseless pounding. I ignored the discomfort, knowing we had work to do and I needed to be focused. This was not a world were one could afford to ignore ones surroundings. Just as we entered the store, Amy stopped. I was forced to stop or risk dragging her behind me, since she was holding my hand.
“What’s wrong, Amy?” I asked quietly, as I looked down at her. I suspected what the problem was, figuring it was probably also the reason for my dizziness and aching chest. The last time we were in a grocery store, someone had died, by Max’s hand. It was little wonder that both Amy and I were feeling apprehensive. Amy simply shook her head, eyes wide and full of tears. Max placed a hand gently behind her shoulder to her push her forward, but Amy began to become hysterical, shaking her head more vigorously. I looked at Max,
“It’s okay, why don’t I just take her outside? We’ll wait for you right by the doors.”
Max frowned, but Amy had already calmed down at the mention of going outside. “I don’t like you guys being alone out there.” He said in a low tone.
“We’ll be fine.” I whispered back. He nodded curtly and hurried deeper into the store. I gently tugged Amy back towards the entrance and into bright sunlight. We move off to the side, out of the way of the door. I leaned against the concrete wall feeling a headache coming on. I did not want to go into that grocery store anymore than Amy did. Every creak and bang would have made me jump, bringing to mind the awful moments leading up to Max stabbing the other man.
Lost in my horrifying day dream, I had not noticed that Amy had wandered a couple of meters away. She was sitting in what was left of some mulch surrounding a decorative tree. I scolded myself internally, how could I be so careless? Something could have happened to her! I strode over to where she sat, playing with little bits of wood and – a painted rock. I froze, heart pumping hard. Could it be another message from Liam?
“Amy, can I see that rock you’re playing with, please? I’ll be quick.” Amy looked up with a frown, but slowly nodded, quickly finding another rock to continue playing with. The stone was painted yellow this time and the bold, black writing read, “Carla and Katherine, meet me at the house with the red door on the northern city limits. Forty-nine oak St. – Liam”. My heart fluttered, this time with excitement. I had to find this house as soon as possible.
Before long, Max was out of the grocery store, having found a sufficient amount of food. He frowned at the painted rock which I had convinced Amy to leave in case Carla was still alive.
“What is that?” He questioned. I smiled at him, excited. In all the chaos that was the last two days, I had forgotten to explain the significance of the rock that I had found on the bridge.
“Max, you remember how I told you that me and my friends, Liam and Carla, used to paint rocks with little messages on them and leave them around town?”
Max looked tense. “Yes?” He said slowly.
“Look at this!” I bent to pick up the rock and handed it to him. “This is from Liam! He is alive!” I paused to catch my breath. “There was one on the bridge we crossed too! That’s what I had stopped to look at.”
Max’s demeanour gave me pause. He looked disconcerted.
“Are you okay?” I put a hand on his arm, peering into his face. “You look upset.”
Max shook his head, “No, no, everything is ok.” He managed a smile, but I was not convinced. “Max, you can tell me – what’s going on?” I felt fear creep in at pushing him. Please don’t get angry again.
He cleared his throat. “It’s just-“ he paused “I’m worried about you. What if Liam is dead? What if something happened to him in-between the time he wrote that message and now? I don’t want you to be hurt again.”
I did not say anything for a moment. To hear my internal fears voiced, made them seem all too real. I shook my head in an effort to rid myself of the negative thoughts.
“I have to hope, Max. Letting my hopes give way to pessimism would kill me.”
He simply nodded.
***
Several hours later, Amy and I sat on the floor in the kitchen in our new home, scrubbing cupboards. We had torn up some old moth-eaten shirts from an upstairs closet for rags, and used some spray bottles of cleaning fluid that Max had taken from the grocery store, so we were quite well-prepared for the disaster of a house which lay before us. I shifted on my knees as my leg had begun to hurt from being in the same position for too long. I stole a glance at Amy, who seemed to be thoroughly enjoy the house-cleaning process, finding treasures in the closets, cupboards, and drawers.
We ate a late lunch and began immediately to work again. We were eager to make our new-found house into a home for ourselves. Amy skipped around the room as she dusted. I smiled as she flopped onto the sofa, causing a little cloud of dust to appear around her. My heart felt warm as I shifted my gaze out the large front windows, to see Max pouring his focus and energy into fixing the stairs. By evening, we had made excellent progress on cleaning the house and Max had managed to not only fix the front step and board up some of the broken windows, but also put a new lock on the front door.
We ate dinner in a pleasant, tired quietness. I grinned at Max from across the now-clean dining room table, feeling satisfied and content. Max smiled back warmly looking from me to Amy, who played with her fork was if it were a doll, “walking” it around and on her plate.
“We can sleep in our own rooms tonight, Max.” I began, as we cleaned up the remains of dinner. I was excited to reveal that we had gotten the bedrooms clean enough to sleep in.
Max looked pleased, “It will be good to sleep on a real bed again.”
“We will still have to use our sleeping bags for now.” I cautioned, “Any bed linens and blankets we found were not in great shape.”
“That’s okay. We can always go back into the city and try to find new ones.” Max smiled.
Later, as we were carrying our sleeping bags up the stairs so we could go to sleep, I turned to Max, “I think we should go to the house Liam wanted to meet at.”
A moment of silence lingered before Max responded, “I am still concerned about this -” He held up a finger as I opened my mouth to protest. “Let’s talk about this in a moment.” He said, as we walked into one of the bedrooms to set Amy’s sleeping bag on her bed. After we had tucked Amy in and stepped out into the hallway, Max motioned to the next bedroom.
“Let’s set up your bed next.” He whispered. Once we had stepped inside, he continued, moving close and speaking in a low tone. “If you really want to, we’ll go tomorrow morning.” I turned to face Max.
“Thank you.” I said simply, but I could not help but beam up at him. I was so eager to try to find Liam.
He gazed down at me, so intently. I felt my stomach flip again, and all thoughts of finding Liam in that moment, were gone. Max took a step closer to me, gently placing the remaining sleeping bag he had been carrying down on the bed.
“Katherine?” He whispered, his breath tickling my ear as it moved my hair ever so slightly. I simply watched him, waiting. His eyes flicked down to my hair, which I had let down after dinner. He lifted his hand, tracing the edge of it to where it fell against my arm.
“I never realized how beautifully dark your hair is.” He took some of it, letting it slide through his open hand.
“You’re stalling.” I whispered with a smile. “You obviously want to say something. So say it.”
“No.” He whispered back as he gently kissed my forehead. “But I did want to do that.” He pulled back, looking into my eyes again. I could feel my face blushing. I tried to duck my head, but he gently caught my chin and tilted it so that we were face to face.
“You are so beautiful.” He paused, one side of his mouth quirking up, “and adorable when you don’t know what to say.”
I finally ducked my head, unable to look him in the eye for another moment, “I’m just really glad we met.”
I could hear the smile in his voice. “Me too.”